Navigating the storms of life

In this blog, Brendan McManus SJ explores the journey of life through the image of a yacht at sea. Drawing on the realities of sailing—wind, weather, risk, preparation and the occasional need for safe harbour—he offers a way of thinking about how we approach the unpredictable nature of life and faith.

Navigating the storms of life; harnessing the power of the Spirit 

Life is like an ocean crossing in a yacht; there is no avoiding the storms if we are to stay true to our nature as ocean-going adventure craft. Staying in a safe harbour is tempting but ultimately spirit-sapping. Similarly, too much time out on the high seas is stressful, and one hankers for a safe port out of the storms. Often, it’s a question of balance.

The Spirit is the ‘breath of God’, the wind that fills our sails and energises our whole lives. We have to learn to harness and work with the wind, though it is a real art knowing when to hang out all the sail in light breezes and, especially, when to reef in when the wind starts to blow. Tacking, gybing and hauling in are all part of the skill, but good decision-making is key: reading the weather and knowing the limits of your boat. The joy and fulfilment that comes from being in harmony with oneself and the sea is unmistakable, though.

Insisting that you only use the outboard engine (slow and steady) is always an option, but it’s not what you are made for; using sail power is riskier but much more fulfilling. Equally, remaining moored up permanently like a houseboat is safe but leaves huge unused potential. There is skill and learning involved in the art of sailing, and it’s not without its risks, but the beauty of assimilating it is priceless.

There is a certain amount of equipment and preparation that is needed at sea, though, and the most important skill is that of judgement and decision-making. Getting it wrong has consequences, and acquiring wisdom is an ongoing process. There are no guarantees, though, and both naivety and complacency are unhelpful; an appreciation of skill, respect for the sea and humility to make the right decisions are what is most useful.

Out on the sea, there are certain skills and techniques you need to employ, always recognising that there is much that is beyond your control, and wisdom consists in knowing your limits and when to sit it out in harbour and when to make a run for it. Being aware and sensitive to the weather and the strengths and weaknesses of the boat is key to good decision-making. A certain amount of information and advice is available, but ultimately you, as captain, have to make the calls. There is companionship, but the watches of the night are largely solitary affairs. Solidarity with other sailors and navigators is a given, and meeting up is a joy to share and exchange information, but there are many solo voyages.

Our mission, of course, is to help others become successful navigators and skilful captains of their vessels, providing support, reflection on good practice and, ultimately, wisdom about life’s journeys. We can’t do it for others, but we can provide lots of support and share our experience.

Remember that some of the greatest ocean-going sailors have lost boats, been shipwrecked and yet have gone on to use this experience to their advantage, learning and integrating wisdom from the past.

11 anchor points to hold on to in a storm:

1. You are a child of God, a work of art, a sailboat on the ocean. The Spirit, the breath of God, blows within you and directs your course. Regardless of how your life has panned out, you are still a beautiful creation; you are destined for great adventures with God’s help.
2. You are a pilgrim on a journey into God, a yacht on a homeward tack; everything on the journey is an invitation to a deeper relationship with Christ. Nothing, no storm, threat or disaster can separate us from God.
3. When difficulties or storms come, as they inevitably will, don’t personalise them (e.g. it’s my fault; it’s because I’m a bad person). Remember, it’s not about you. Rather, look for opportunities to grow and find God there in the mess and the challenge.
4. Remember God is still with you in the storm even if you don’t feel it – it’s not about the feelings; you are more than your feelings. You need to go deeper, realising that storms will pass.
5. Pray with the problem facing you, not trying to escape it or minimise it, but rather face into it with God’s help. There’s no point in wishing you were somewhere else when the weather turns foul; you need all your resources applied to navigation and decision-making.
6. Ask for help and take advice. Resist the temptation to keep it all inside and rather act against this, praying and enlisting trusted supports to help you. Pride and arrogance are very destructive; believe that there is a way through every storm, even if it’s not immediately obvious.
7. In a crisis, don’t panic or react emotionally (i.e. knee-jerk), even though you feel overwhelming emotional pressure to do so. Try to get some distance, pray and talk it out, and decide when you are at balance. A good rule of thumb is to play for time; give yourself 24 hours at least.
8. Don’t change course in midstream. Keep faithful to your basic commitments, those decisions that you have made in times of calm, and resist the terrible temptation to give everything up as lost, rendering yourself vulnerable to the waves.
9. Look for the possibilities in challenging situations. Remember, you always have options or choices, even the most basic of accepting and being OK with difficult situations. Normally, there are choices or decisions that are not immediately obvious that you have to work through and get advice or help on.
10. Remember the dynamic of the Cross: in moments of darkness and apparent abandonment, God works most powerfully. Use the same words that Jesus uses on the Cross to pray through your own darkness: ‘Into your hands I commend my spirit’; ‘not my will but your will be done’; ‘why have you forsaken me?’
11. Hold on to gratitude as much as you can. See the bright side, use humour and don’t take yourself too seriously; use the Examen prayer to rescue gratitude, find the glimmers of light and be open to what God is saying to you.